


Pictures for me

by MurderBaby



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Actually things escalate rather quickly, Aged-Up Character(s), Blood, But just a little, Can't resist my smooch babies, Comfort/Angst, Eventual Smut, Fluff, I'm a little bit a monster, I'm not a monster, M/M, Nevermind smut is here, Rough Sex, but just enough
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-06-08 14:40:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6859120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MurderBaby/pseuds/MurderBaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gon doesn't just want to photograph Killua when he's smiling for the camera. He wants to record everything. The good, and the bad. When Killua has to move on, Gon wants to carry something of him in his pocket.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pictures

Gon stuck his tongue out whenever he was really concentrating. His pink tongue peaked out of his mouth, and Killua watched it curl up as the shutter clicked, clicked, clicked. 

"Got it!" Gon shouted. He pulled the strap around his neck up and over his head, roughly. Killua cringed. He'd spent a couple expensive gigs' worth of money on that new camera for Gon's recent 18th birthday. Gon flipped the device around, and that tongue reappeared as he clicked through the photo roll.

"Look, Killua, see?" Gon said, with one of his knees in the wet grass, and waved his friend over. Killua stepped next to his friend, and bent over. 

Gon had been trying to get a shot of this damn flower all morning. He dragged Killua out of bed at 5 in the morning to come with him. Killua told him, repeatedly, that there was absolutely no good reason for him to come, too. Gon's pout won that particular argument, though. 

"You have to be there just as the sun rises. The flower changes colors when it opens, and it opens just when the sun starts to touch the petals," Gon had explained while they hiked, full of energy and high spirits as Killua yawned besides him. Killua could just nod, and grab the full thermos of sweet, black coffee out of his friend's backpack. 

"Oh, damn!" Killua said, more than pleasantly surprised as he looked at the screen. He felt a familiar and irresistible type of smile grow on his face. The flower looked like a daffodil. The outer petals transitioned from a dark blue at the tips to a soft, buttery white color at the base, as the sunlight traveled from top to bottom. The inner, star-shaped set of petals looked like the purple and blue swirl of a particularly pretty sunset. As Gon clicked through the photos, the flower transformed from that soft white to dark, royal blue. It changed before Killua's eyes like an animation in a flip book.

The way Gon had composed the photos, as well as the unique properties of the flower itself, made the pictures look like paintings. Like it had been painted with water colors. The lighting and angle and other stuff Gon would probably start babbling at him about next really did something magical to whatever Gon chose to point it at. 

"That really does look great, Gon, good job," Killua said, proudly. Gon actually blushed, and licked his lips as he smiled. He looked up at Killua. 

Red cheeks, and that pink tongue. Too much to resist. Killua bent his head closer, and pressed his lips against Gon's. Gon still jumped in surprise whenever Killua did that. Gon mumbled something wordless, and kissed him back, until he remembered something.

"Oh, wait," Gon said, falling back on his behind, and pulling his head away from Killua's face. He turned the camera off, and slipped its strap back around his neck. He stood up. He pressed his lips together, and grabbed the straps of his backpack. He bit his bottom lip, and looked down at his shoes. Killua had to swallow, hard, so he didn't just grab that warm, brown face with both hands, and go to town. 

"So, can I?" Gon said. 

Killua felt the groan leave his throat before he realized he was doing it. He ran his right hand through his messy hair. 

"Dude, we already talked about this..."

Gon looked back up at him. His eyes glinted with that particular golden sheen that meant he wasn't prepared to give up the fight yet. It made Killua's stomach float and bounce, like a helium balloon, whenever he did that, so a lot of the time Gon got exactly what he wanted. 

"I know, Killua, but just...I know you're going to have to go soon, and it would be really great to have them, you know? When I miss you so much, and when I can't see you," Gon said, with sadness, and with longing. Killua had known that Gon would use this underhanded tactic. He felt his heart clench. He clucked his tongue in irritation.

"But Gon, you have pictures of me. You have pictures of us. You take selfies of us every damn day," Killua said, with a growl meant to distract himself from his squeezing heart as much as it was meant to try and end the conversation. 

"I love all of my pictures of you, Killua," Gon said. He pressed his bent index finger to his mouth. "But there's the parts of you that only I'm allowed to see, and I miss those times most of all," Gon said, his voice dripping and sticky and warm like molten lava cake. 

Killua groaned, again, with his own feelings of soft, persistent desire. He grabbed Gon by the shoulders, and pulled him in. He buried his face in his friend's hair. His boyfriend? His Gon. Whatever.

"I’m not going anywhere yet, Gon, so why not just try not to worry about the next time I have to leave?" Killua asked, muffled by thick black hair. It tickled his nose, and he had to pull his head back quickly to avoid sneezing. Gon laughed.

"That's true," Gon said. He grabbed Killua's hand, and pulled him off towards the next part of their day's adventure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More procrastinating fluff that popped into my head while I should have been working on my final paper for my Master's program, or my longer HxH fic. But inspiration can't be denied! There'll be at least half a dozen chapters, if my inspiration keeps up with me. 
> 
> I am seriously up for any feedback, good or bad. Thank you so much for reading!


	2. Mushrooms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to shout out Bitchii_usa and the sweet AU story Of Sungods and Moon Children (http://archiveofourown.org/works/6202519) for also featuring a photographer Gon. I swear on a precariously stacked pile of bibles that my inspiration for a Gon that took photos came a day before I read that story. But when I read that fic, I knew it was destiny, and I had to record my own version.

The fresh mushrooms hissed as they hit the pan. The butter and garlic smelled like heaven, and the sound of the mushrooms sizzling made Killua's mouth water. 

Learning how to cook had been one of the most surprisingly enjoyable things he'd learned how to do since he'd started traveling with Alluka. Even though he knew he could subsist on chocolates and cookies and sundaes everyday, and be perfectly content, he had felt more than a little guilty knowing all he was able to feed his little sister was sweets and take out. 

"Brother, mushrooms, really? Mushrooms are weird!"

Killua smiled, with only a touch of irritation, as Alluka piped up over the sound of sauteing vegetables, and the scrape of his spatula. He knew it was a blessing, really, that Alluka had learned enough about the world that she could express preferences. Also, he was happy that she felt comfortable enough with their relationship to really embrace being his whiny little sister. Still couldn't help but set his teeth on edge. He knew he had to strike back. 

"Yeah, but, cutie pie, Gon picked these mushrooms," Killua said, as he tossed salt on the mushrooms. Alluka gasped. He knew he'd said the magic words. 

"Oh, really, Gon?" Alluka asked, turning on her sweetest voice. Killua couldn't see Gon, but could clearly imagine his shy, blushing face. 

"I found them when Killua and I were out on our hike this morning. They're called Jumping Toad mushrooms," Gon said. Killua heard Alluka groan and make a face. 

"That doesn't sound very good, Gon!" 

"No, they're really delicious! Plus, I know Killua will make something amazing with them," Gon said. 

They did sort of look like little toads. They had two round heads that rounded out of a flat, lily-pad shaped base. The speckle of colors did resemble a toad's brown, dappled skin. It smelled like the forest, moist and alive. He grinned before it dropped in the pan to become their delicious dinner.

\----

Gon had taken off like a shot as they headed deeper into the forest when he, apparently, smelled them. He turned a corner, and Killua heard a thump as Gon dropped his backpack, and a grunt as Gon’s whole body followed suit. 

"Killua! Here!" Gon had said, waving him over for the dozenth or so time that morning. Gon had a million and one things he wanted to point out. This time, Gon flopped right onto his stomach, covering the front of his tank top and shorts with wet, muddy leaves. He pointed the camera into a shadowy nook under a crowd of bushes. 

Killua stepped carefully behind him. Gon's concentration and focus could stand un-moving in a hurricane, but it felt disrespectful to interrupt it all the same. After a dozen or so clicks, Gon passed the camera over to Killua, for safe keeping. Killua held it delicately, avoiding touching any of the complicated knobs or buttons. 

"What'd you find?" Killua asked as Gon started crawling into the dark cave formed by the branches and leaves. As Killua fought that overwhelming urge to crouch down, and tickle Gon's underarms until he cried with laughter, Gon's burst out of the underbrush, soil and moss clinging to his arms and hair. 

"Mushrooms!" Gon said, delighted. He passed them to Killua, as Killua quickly slipped the camera's strap over his own neck. 

"So, are these edible?" Killua asked, already taking a bite. Killua didn't have to worry about the toxicity of something simple, like a wild mushroom, but he couldn't include it in any recipes he'd prepare for Alluka and Gon if it was poisonous. 

"Yeah! They're great. Can you use them?" Gon asked, as he crawled deeper under the bush, pulling up more of his discoveries. 

The mushroom tasted soft, a little sweet, and also pretty savory. It didn't resemble any other mushroom Killua had ever tasted. 

"Definitely, I'm excited to try them cooked," Killua said, munching on the discovery. Gon crawled back out of the hole, and handed Killua another bunch to awkwardly hold. Gon smiled, and stood up. 

"Gon, you're always full of surprises," Killua said, as he knelt down to put his handful of mushrooms into one of the pockets of the backpack. Before he closed the pack, he plucked out one of the tiniest, brown and white treasures. He popped it in his mouth, chewing slowly. 

As he stood back up, Killua heard the digitized shutter sound that meant Gon had just pulled out his phone, and taken a picture. 

"Hey, wait..." Killua said, and looked over. Gon smiled into his phone's screen. "Was that one just now of me?" Killua asked. 

Gon's not-actually-guilty-at-all expression said it all, as he stuck out his tongue, and clutched his phone to his chest.

"This is just for me!" Gon said, already off running and laughing. Killua tried to squash his embarrassed blush as he took off after Gon. 

It wasn't actually a challenge for Killua to catch up as they scrambled across the wet forest floor, and Gon didn't really try that hard to get away from Killua's scooping arms as he grabbed him around the chest, and held his wrist still. 

"Killua...." Gon said with a pout, and a grin. Killua pried the phone out of Gon's fingers, and quickly tapped in Gon's unlock code. 

"Wait, you know my password! How?!" 

"Gon, you dummy, it's 1234. You're basically begging for me to break into your phone, and mess with shit."

The photo came up as soon as the lock screen blinked away. The image really wasn't any anything surprising: a blurry, slightly out of focus snapshot of Killua bending over Gon's backpack.

In the last few years since Killua had set Alluka free, he'd grown tall, lanky, and sharp. His bones moved awkwardly under his skin. He had always made use of his body with practiced ease, but growing into his adult body, and the life of relative leisure he and his sister now led, left him feeling unfinished and rough. 

Somehow though, from Gon's perspective, the uncomfortable and unfamiliar length Killua felt in his arms and legs looked long, strong, and elegant. One hand emptied the mushrooms into the pocket of the bag, while his mouth wrapped around the index finger of his other hand as he chewed on a mushroom he'd just shoved in. His face looked carefree, pleased, relaxed, and, more than anything, normal. Like a what a normal teenage boy was supposed to look like. 

Not at all like what Killua actually saw when he looked in the mirror. 

Killua walked away from Gon as he looked at the photo. He felt his head fill with heat and buzzing bees. He tossed the phone over his shoulder, and he heard Gon exclaim with gentle annoyance as he caught it.

"Jeesh, Killua, you're the one always telling me not to break stuff," Gon said. 

"Why'd you take that one?" Killua asked, without looking back. He heard Gon pick up his backpack, and catch up with him at a jog. 

"Hmmm," Gon said, seriously considering the question. "You mean, other than, because it's Killua?"

Killua looked at Gon, and then looked away, just as quickly. He cleared his throat. 

"Yeah, I mean, that answer still doesn't make any sense, so you'll have to give me more than that." 

Gon hummed again. 

"Because I gave you something that made you happy, and I don't want to forget that." 

\---- 

"Killua? Killua?!"

"Brother, the thing is buzzing! Buzz, buzz, buzz!"

Killua had been lost in thought as he scraped his skillet against the pan. It took Gon's question, Alluka's voice, and the beeping of his phone's alarm ringing together to shake his attention loose. 

"Oh, shit, forgot about that..." Killua muttered, and bent down to peer in the oven. The smells grounded Killua back in the present of their small, rented kitchen apartment where Killua and Alluka had been laying low during the muggy summer months. 

When Gon appeared on their door step almost 2 months ago, older, tanner, wider, and happier than Killua had seen him since they'd first met, it felt like Killua had been split in two. Half of him was 12, giddy with the power of his body, and the freedom of really leaving his family behind for the first time. 

The other half had to fight back unexplained, irrational, unacceptable white-hot tears. He had to close his eyes tightly to stop hearing his memories scream in pain and terror as he looked at his broad, strong, handsome, dear friend's face. 

"It smells really good, Killua!" Gon exclaimed. 

Gon's voice used to ground Killua to the present, too. Now, though, Killua had to press his feet into the ground, and hold the burning handle of the pan a moment longer with only the thin oven mitt for protection to remind himself of where he was. 

"Of course it does. That's because I made it," Killua replied with a smirk, as he carefully balanced the pan in his hands, and shut the door with his foot. He waved Alluka's hand away, but couldn't move fast enough to stop Gon's hands from plucking a tiny, sizzling piece of charred gristle from the side. Gon howled with pain as he tossed his stolen prize in his mouth. 

"For fuck's sake, Gon, you deserve to burn your mouth if you're going to do something stupid like that," Killua sighed. He turned back to the stove. 

"Worth it!" Gon said. 

The mushrooms had been an unexpected surprise, but they fit the rest of the meal perfectly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to finishing my Master's program, and devoting myself to my next life project - KilluGon stories until my typing hands weep at me to stop!


	3. Nighttime

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The one where things escalate quickly.

Killua watched the lights turn off, one by one, until only moonlight crept under the door to his bedroom. Gon's voice vibrated through the wall, no matter how quietly the young man tried to whisper. The door to his sister's room shut, as expected, and two big feet padded across the floor.

Killua held his breath. The blankets and blow up air mattress in the living room sat ready for Gon. 

It also had gone basically unused since Gon's first night. 

Tonight resembled that first night Gon slipped into Killua's room, down to the muffled yelp as Gon's toes bang into the coffee table. 

Just like that night, Gon and Alluka had stayed up way too late, looking at Gon's photos, and giggling while Gon told his sister some embarrassing story or other from Killua's days adventuring with Gon. 

"Killua? Can I come in?" Gon asked, peeking through the door. Just like that night, and every subsequent night, since. 

"Gon, just get in here," Killua replied. This now familiar question and response had become their nightly routine. 

Gon quickly slipped inside, and closed the door behind as quietly as he could. Killua rolled away from the door, and looked towards the window. He felt the smallest spark of irritation every time Gon felt the need to ask permission to come in, and yet he still blushed with embarrassment when Gon pulled his shirt off over his head, slipped out of his worn shorts, and carefully placed his boots and socks near the door. 

Killua only heard the rustle of fabric before the mattress shifted under his body as Gon climbed up beside him. 

"Thank you for dinner, Killua," Gon whispered. Loudly. Gon was capable of attempting to do both with his voice. Killua shrugged, and rolled on his back. 

"No big," Killua said. Actually whispering. He tipped his head towards the person laying in bed next to him, whose knees were curled up to his bare chest. Even in the low light, he could see two big eyes slide closer to his face, paying careful attention. 

"It was really good," Gon said in his normal voice, abandoning the pretense that he was capable of quiet or subtlety. Killua shrugged again. Gon's too loud whisper, and effortless praise. His warm body. The privacy of darkness. All of this had somehow now become Killua's nightly routine. 

"Killua," Gon said, voice dropping, sliding out of his mouth like warm honey. Gon's lips pressed against Killua's neck. 

Gon's deep voice, curling in and around him, had become familiar, too. But not routine. 

Killua tipped his head up, and closed his eyes. Gon moaned, and continued kissing along Killua's pale throat. He could manage to do that quietly, Killua reflected with gratitude. 

"Killua, can I?" Gon asked. He asked every night. Gon never assumed. 

Killua's brain shouted *Yes!* His heart had skipped ahead, waiting for Gon to follow. His body had been begging since the moment Gon opened the door. He nodded, once, bumping his chin against Gon's nose. 

Gon grinned, and slid his strong, wonderfully heavy body on top of Killua's. He stretched his hands down his sides until he could slip them under the hem of Killua's shirt. Sometimes he left the shirt on, busy with some other project. Tonight, he carefully removed it. Killua lifted his arms above his head to help. 

Slow, unhurried kisses were the theme of the evening, and Killua shivered after each one of them. Gon's two powerful legs moved. Kept his body perched carefully out of Killua's body's reach. The only connection between the two was Gon's soft mouth, and his careful, calloused hands. 

Killua had predicted Gon's goal, but it was more fun to wait. When Gon took too long figuring out how to manage his hands and his hungry mouth when removing Killua's shorts, however, Killua huffed, and shoved the waistband down himself. 

Gon gave one bark of laughter, and sat up to help Killua finish the job. He set the shorts carefully next to them. 

Killua opened his eyes. Gon knelt with his legs straddling Killua's left thigh. Gon smiled wide enough he reflected the thin moonlight with his teeth and eyes. It was impossible for Killua not to notice where Gon's eyes traveled, and why his smile grew. Killua blushed so hotly that it made him uncomfortable. 

Killua had to move his legs, shifting under Gon's compelling, staring eyes. His knees bent up, and brushed against Gon's body. He felt same urgency in Gon's body that curled up within himself, ready to strike. 

"Oh!" Gon said, startled. He reflexively pulled himself away from Killua's brief, accidental touch.

"Gon," Killua said, unable to hold back. "I don't..." 

"Shhh!" Gon said softly, and leaned forward. He angled his body so his hands and mouth were the only parts in contact with Killua's skin. Killua's hand lay at his side. Gon covered them, stilled them, with his wide palm, and strong grip. His mouth found Killua's again. 

Killua felt frustrated, the same frustration he'd felt for weeks now. That frustration boiled inside of his body, and mixed with his desire until he could barely tell them apart.

Gon, always better thinking on his feet than sitting back to consider the situation carefully, seemed to realize the effect these restrictions had on Killua's body. He seemed to know exactly when it tried to spill out and over the sides. 

Tonight, as Killua kissed Gon back, the only contact Gon allowed Killua to participate in, he felt the frustration boil harder. The slowly built fire Gon had built with his careful touch stoked something that felt almost impossible for Killua to contain. 

Killua lifted his head up, forcing Gon to awkwardly tip his head back. He ran the point of his hot tongue along Gon's bottom lip, and pressed his teeth into the pink flesh. Gon's lips and tongue met him eagerly, for a moment, before Killua felt everything go still. 

Gon pulled his head away, with his eyes closed.

Killua had always been able to read Gon's expressions. Gon didn't have a poker face, but even subtle emotions felt as clearly written for Killua to read as the words in a book. 

Gon's face now compounded that boiling frustration with its perplexing mix of desire and fear. Killua felt his desire throb, and his heart ache with shame. As Gon leaned back, he'd released the grip on Killua's hands. Killua's hands scrambled as he pulled himself back until he sat with his back against the bed's headboard. 

Gon opened his eyes, and frowned. "Killua? What's wrong?"

Killua's heart flashed in his chest. He opened his mouth, dumbfounded. "What's wrong?!" Killua snapped back, with a loud whisper. Killua saw Gon's face fall at his anger. He threw his head back. He wasn't angry. He was hurt. He couldn't explain precisely why. He tipped his head forward, again, and rubbed his mouth with his hand. 

"You won't let me touch you, Gon," Killua said, finally. He chewed on his thumbnail as the awkward words fell from his mouth. They'd played this game for weeks now. Gon sneaked into his bed every night, and every night felt like it left Killua with burn marks in his skin from Gon's touch. 

Killua knew Gon was his first, and dearest, friend. Just being around Gon again had satisfied him more than he could say.

The confusing feelings from so long ago had never lined up correctly inside. He figured that Gon, being Gon, being the overwhelming force that appeared in Killua's life like some waking dream, simply set everything inside of him tumbling out in every direction. 

Wanting to know Gon in that way made as little sense as wanting anyone in that way would have. Man or woman. Younger than him, older than him. A normal person who would be left behind, or a partner that threatened the balance of power too profoundly to be allowed in. He left those flushed dreams behind when he'd parted from Gon years ago.

When Gon reappeared, those dreams were enacted in the private warmth of his own bed. It didn't make much sense to question the logic of dreams.

And yet.

Gon wasn't a dream. His brown skin and intense eyes made Killua's mouth go dry. When he managed to kiss Gon's full lips, the surprised moan, and small sounds of instinctive pleasure from deep in his friend's chest, made his knees go weak. Killua wanted Gon. He wanted to discover what Gon had hidden under his skin, the way Gon had peeled back Killua for inspection countless times in the last few months.

But Gon ducked away from Killua's touch. It felt like he'd been accidentally electrifying him. Like his touch was painful to Gon. Or, disgusting. Or, something even worse. 

Gon's eyes widened at Killua's words. He said nothing for a long time. Killua realized he was shaking. He also realized with a dizzying rush that he was definitely still naked. He felt the blush travel down his face and neck and chest. He curled his legs up to his chest, and pulled the sheet up to his chin. He looked down at the dark waves of the sheets. 

"No, Killua, that's not it," Gon said. The hitch in Gon's voice made Killua whimper in response. 

"Gon?"

Gon pressed his two hands against his eyes. 

"No, you're wrong," Gon said. He sounded like he was on the brink of tears. "I definitely want you to touch me, Killua," Gon continued, weakly. 

Killua's lips curled, in a pleased smile, and then down into a frown, just as quickly. 

"Then, why? You've never...said so before. I didn't think you wanted me to," Killua said. 

These were the most words they'd ever exchanged about what Gon did for Killua every night. The atmosphere tended to render Killua speechless. Gon would just smile, and curl up next to Killua like a cat who found the cream. 

Dreams didn't make sense. You had to be awake to question the parts that didn't add up. 

Now they were both awake. 

"No, it's the complete opposite," Gon said. His voice sounded like he was fighting something that wasn't entirely under his control. Tears? Laughter? Some mix of both?

"I am afraid of what would happen," Gon said. 

"You're afraid?" Killua replied. His stomach filled with ice water. "Gon, do you think I would hurt you?"

Gon pulled his own knees into his chest. He clasped his hands together, and pressed his thumbs to his lips. 

"I'm worried about me," Gon said. "About what I would do, to you." 

Gon's voice was hot, and dark. Gon sounded scared.

Killua often felt Gon's feelings as if they were his own. He felt this feeling reflected inside, too. But Killua wasn't afraid.

He was excited. 

"What you'd do to me?" Killua replied. Low, with a thick rasp. Gon's eyes widened, and his eyebrows lifted. Killua looked at the surprise on Gon's face. He didn't know what the outcome would be, but wasn't it Gon who'd taught him how to face the unknown with bravery, instead of searching for his closest option for retreat?

"You mean other than every time you wrapped your lips around my cock until I came all over your tongue?" 

Gon's eyes narrowed. He lifted his head. Killua watched him lick his lips. Killua stopped shivering as heat coursed within him. As he climbed to his knees, the sheet dropped away from his body. 

"Or something worse than when you jerked me off, and licked the cum off my belly?"

Killua sat with his feet folded under him. He felt completely bare, and completely exposed. Gon's vision traveled down his body as unavoidably as the brush of fingertips. He couldn't touch Gon, but Gon listened to every word like his life depended on it. 

"Do you think, Gon, that I wouldn't be fucking thrilled to let you come down my throat while I shoved my fingers in your mouth to keep you quiet?"

Gon's body unfolded. He climbed on his knees, too, mirroring Killua. He pressed both hands to the top of his thighs. Killua watched Gon's legs spread. Gon wore only faded cotton boxers. He watched Gon's stomach rise and fall with every pant. He desperately wanted to reach his fingertips to growing bulge under the thin fabric. Gon said nothing. Killua smirked, and curled his fingers into his palms.

"You've thought about it, right?"

"Yes," Gon said, quickly. Gon gulped in air, like every moment he stayed still forced him to use precious stores of energy. 

"So what do you do, then, exactly, after thinking about it?" Killua asked. Killua nodded his head, and watched as Gon's eyes followed him down to consider his incredibly obvious, probably incredibly uncomfortable erection. 

"Alone," Gon gasped. "I take care of it..."

"In the shower?"

"Sometimes."

Killua's mouth opened, and closed. He grinned. He couldn't help it.

"After I fall asleep?"

"Yes." 

Gon's beautiful eyes took on an air of desperation as he searched Killua's face and body for relief, and found none. The way Gon looked at Killua only made him feel even meaner, even more desperate to learn where Gon's fearful lust would lead. 

And then the crucial connection was made.

"That's what the pictures are for!" Killua said, excited to solve a puzzle. He blinked as the truth landed deep in his gut. Gon's eyes opened wide again, startled. Killua watched the muscles in Gon's jaw move as he bit down. Gon nodded, and looked down. 

When Gon suggested he wanted to take portraits of Killua, he had felt too embarrassed to consider the idea. Especially when Gon showed him examples of the type he hoped to take. Soft lighting, and models with weird, empty eyes. The idea made Killua feel exposed like a specimen under a microscope. Like there was no possible way he would look like anything but an awkward mess.

He hadn't realized exactly what Gon really meant to accomplish with the photos. Especially because Gon's behavior had been so disorienting. Like entering another universe every night, and leaving it behind in the clarity of morning. 

Now, though, all he could picture was Gon's face. His lips and eyes and hands. That strong jaw moving as one hand held his phone open, clicking through photos. His other hand wrapped tightly around his erect cock. 

"Fuck," Killua muttered. Gon looked up.

"Show me," Killua said. "Show me what you'd do with them. The real thing is better than a picture, anyway, right? I won't touch you if you don't want me to. But I..."

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

"I want to watch."


	4. Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The one where the escalation takes a turn. Some minor violence, and sexy shenanigans, ahead.

Gon clasped his fingers together. He held the weave of fingers close to his chest. 

"What I'd do with them?" Gon muttered. It was clear he wasn't asking Killua a question. He closed his eyes. He opened them again, slowly. Killua gritted his teeth.

"I would look at them," Gon said. The words were obvious and simple. What else would someone do with pictures? Gon looked up. Gon's gaze pierced deep into Killua's heart like daggers. 

"Like you're looking at me now?" Killua asked. 

Gon's mouth curled into a small smile. His eternal partner in crime began to build this new alliance.

“I won't touch you, Gon,” Killua said. “I would tackle you to the bed in one heartbeat if you asked me to. But, fuck, Gon.”

Killua paused. Gon's hand touched the valleys and plateaus of his own toned stomach muscles. 

“It's not fair that your imaginary Killua gets to have all the fun of watching your face when you orgasm.”

“You...want to see me?” Gon asked. Flushed with his own shame, and need.

“What are you talking about, Gon?” Killua asked. His throat closed up, and his mouth went dry. “You're...fuck, Gon, you're gorgeous,” Killua stuttered. 

It was embarrassing to have to try to explain to the air he breathed why oxygen kept him from dying. Gon's face and hands and muscular arms and rippling back muscles were illustrated in cross hatch in Killua's mind next to the word “Handsome.”

Gon's sweet brown cheeks glowed. He looked like he couldn't figure out whether to smile, laugh, or cry. 

Killua groaned, and whimpered, and whined. He blushed, too, and pressed his thumbnail to his teeth.

“Um, I can try," Gon said. 

The slowest minute ever experienced by anyone in history separated Killua's gaze from Gon's naked cock. 

Gon slowly jammed his thumbs under the waistband of his boxers. Gon's erection bobbed up and out of the thin boxers. 

“Gon,” Killua whispered. Gon looked at him, looked down at himself, and looked away.

“I promise we can stop, Gon, whenever you want,” Killua said. Gon's face continued to attract him as powerfully as it perplexed him. He had no real idea how Gon felt right now.

“No, I want to try,” Gon said. Purred, actually. A golden humming sound escaped his throat. Killua looked down.

Gon wrapped his thumb and forefinger around the tip of his cock. It looked different from Killua's. Gon's fingers pulled back soft, brown folds of skin, until a shiny red bulb emerged. 

“Oh, shit,” Killua panted. How had he allowed this perfect sight to go unseen his entire life until now?

Gon curled his lips into his mouth. He winked one eye closed as he began to move his hand. 

The grip tightened. Killua had not realized until now that a person could wish with every fiber of their being to be a hand, and yet here he was. 

“Is this…good?” Gon asked. 

Killua's body felt blurry with lust. “You tell me,” he replied.

“Yes,” Gon whispered. Finally managing quiet as his pleasure narrowed his capacity for speech. “Whenever I look at you, Killua, it's good.”

Killua felt the words fill him to the brim with blood dark need. 

Killua found his own throbbing, desperate hardness without taking his eyes off of Gon. Gon gasped, and sighed.

“You didn't say I couldn't touch myself, Gon,” Killua muttered, his voice sharply edged.

“No, that's… really good,” Gon said. 

Words lost their shape in Killua's mouth. He grunted. He felt a painful tug of war between closing his eyes in a cascade of sensations, and watching the exquisite torture of Gon's slick arms and heaving chest and blurred fist. 

It shouldn't have been a surprise when this turned into a race. It really shouldn't have been a surprise when Killua burst ahead.

Killua's spine turned electric. His eyes slammed shut. Wordless sounds poured out. He leaned backwards until his free hand propped him up.

Killua felt the warmth of his release coat his hands and belly. He felt his leg muscles quiver.

As he managed to open his eyes, Gon's dark, honey colored eyes filled his vision as strong hands pushed him flat against the bed.

"Killua," Gon groaned. He said the name like a curse. Gon's kiss pulled all of Killua's capacity to think critically away. 

Killua felt Gon's free arm wrap around his back and shoulders. Fingernails dug into his skin. Gon's mouth moved to Killua's neck, and teeth threatened to pierce the vulnerable skin. Killua clung to Gon's roiling body. 

Everything turned sharp. The dream of the last two months shattered as Gon's sticky cock rubbed against Killua's stomach. Gon's mouth released Killua's skin, and Gon looked down at him with fierce eyes, and a jaw of iron. 

"Killua, I want..." Gon heaved. He moved his hips. Killua spread his legs. 

Killua couldn't speak. He felt his mouth loll open worthlessly. He grunted out something close to affirmation, and nodded. 

Gon looked at him. Killua's eyes reflected the intensity. 

"Killua, I want to..." Gon growled, deeply. It sounded like some deeper, primal self filled Gon's body in that moment. 

The sensations collided into each other. Gon's sticky, desperate movements continued. Killua could feel that fist work so hard the friction made his own body ache. Gon bent his head down. He pressed his teeth into Killua's neck, again, and bit down. The slippery sting of a bleeding cut made Killua's eyes close. 

Gon's free hand gripped Killua's bicep like a vice. Killua could already feel the bruise pool under his skin, and it only made him moan louder. He had to jam his hand into his mouth to silence himself. 

"I want!" Gon said, unable to finish the thought as he moaned incoherently. 

Gon's body went still, for a moment, and then exploded. Gon's hips curled up as he came all over his hand, and Killua's chest and stomach. He collapsed with a loud exhalation, and pressed his face into the crook of Killua's neck. 

Killua watched his friend's exquisite face transform from the torture of his desire, to beautiful acceptance, to some gorgeous relaxation. He very, very gently pressed his finger tips to the back of Gon's neck.

"Blood," Gon said, with a raw voice. Killua felt his arms fly apart as Gon threw himself backwards. 

"Killua, I'm so sorry," Gon said. Killua blinked in confusion. Gon's eyes were fixed on his neck. Killua lifted his hand across his chest, and touched the small cut. He shivered. He felt his eyelids drop as some thick, delicious dark feeling was born at the base of him. It crept from his toes, and grew until it threatened to pour out of his mouth. He looked down at his pale skin, growing cold in the darkness. 

"Wait, Gon, no," Killua said. By the time he'd looked up again, Gon had climbed off the bed, with one hand pressed to his eyes. He pulled up his shorts, and slipped on his shirt and shoes. Killua stood, and grabbed his own shorts.

"I'm sorry," Gon said. He opened the door, and slipped out quietly. By the time Killua had pulled on his own shorts, he heard the front door to the apartment open and close. 

_Fuck._

Killua peeked his head out of the door. Across the apartment, Alluka peeked her head out of her door, rubbing her sleep out of her eyes.

"Is everything okay?" Alluka muttered. At least she slept through this debacle, Killua thought with a sliver of relief.

"Gon had to...go," Killua said. He hated to lie to Alluka. (Plus, she always saw through it.) That was the only thing he could reasonably say.

Alluka puffed her cheeks out. 

"You made Gon mad, didn't you?" Alluka said, angrily. "We knew you would, eventually."

Perfect, Killua thought. Exactly what he needed along with this was his sister, and his sister's other self, hating him, too.

"What did you do?"

Killua just frowned.

_I wanted him._


	5. Moonlight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The one where things escalate, like, all the way. ALL THE WAY. The one where it's longer than the other chapters put together.
> 
> I am bad at tags, and they make me feel embarrassed. I am not going to spoil my smut! So here they are.
> 
> Butt sex. It's happening. 
> 
> Bless you for reading.

The irritating jingle of Gon's beetle phone and the obnoxious smooth jazz of his smart phone with the camera both rang within Killua's earshot after attempted calls. The beetle phone was in Gon's backpack, and the smart phone had fallen out of his pants pocket as he'd scrambled out of Killua's room a few minutes earlier.

_Mother fuck._

Killua had already tossed on his shirt. He slipped on his running shoes, without bothering to find his socks. He stepped over to Alluka's door, and it opened just as his knuckle was about to make contact with it.

"Are you going to look for Gon?" Alluka asked. Killua nodded curtly.

"Yes. Alluka, and..." Killua grabbed her upper arm gently. "Nanika. I need you to listen."

"Killua?" said Alluka, and her other self, with a voice that seemed to split in two.

"If I'm not back in 6 hours, I want you to bring me to wherever you are, okay?"

"Killua?"

A beat.

"Brother?"

"Do you understand?"

Alluka's eyes went dark. She nodded, and tipped her head down.

"I don't think you need to worry, cutie," Killua said, softly. He tipped her chin up with his forefinger. "Gon and I just need to talk."

Alluka looked up, and frowned.

"We love Gon," Alluka said. Killua hugged her, and pressed his lips to the top of her head.

"Yes, we do."

Killua could step out the front door of the apartment, and swing over the open air walkway in front of their door, and be ten feet from the large forest bordering this small city. His tracking ability hadn't fallen totally apart under the weight of its rust, but even if he didn't want to find Gon, it'd be impossible to miss the bushes blasted apart by two tree trunks of pistoning brown flesh barreling into the forest.

Killua gathered aura under his feet, and uncurled his hands. He took full, leaping strides through the path of broken branches, and crushed ferns. He realized the destination was one of the locations they'd traveled to this morning. Killua heard Gon's exuberant voice floating through the air as he ran. Gon explained the significance of one of the spots where they'd paused together this morning.

"We should come back here at night, soon, Killua. I would love to show you this," Gon had said. He pointed at a huge boulder covered in moss.

"You'd love to show me a rock?" Killua said, through swallows of lukewarm coffee. He said it with a smile, and Gon stuck his tongue out at him.

"It's hard to explain. You just have to see it."

It only took a few minutes of running to find the scene that was beyond Gon's capacity to describe with words.

The boulder had become the moon.

Okay, so that was definitely a string of words that Gon could have managed to use this morning to explain what he meant. Unconsciously considering this, though, curled Killua's lips into their practiced, mocking curve. He lifted his eyebrows, and crinkled his nose. If Gon had tried to use those words earlier today, Killua would have thumped him on the forehead, and trilled out a long, hearty, "Neeeeeerd."

Green blankets of thick, soft moss coated the boulder in the morning. It looked as unremarkable to Killua as any other rock, but Gon's voice sounded soft and admiring when he saw it. Gon ran ahead of Killua, and pressed one finger, and then two fingers, and then his palm, his fist, and two fists into the plush, living blanket. Gon shadow boxed, in slow motion, as he tried to solve this mystery. The moss still held Gon's hand and fist prints for long minutes after Gon stepped back, thinking with his chin in his hand. 

"Hmmm," Gon said. Killua continued to stand meters away, quietly amused by Gon's fascination. Gon leaned in one more time. Killua watched Gon's small, upturned nose wrinkle twice. Gon laughed in triumph.

"This is it!"

It was startling in the darkness. Shadowed by the night sky, and the broad canopy of trees, the pillowtop cover of green covering the boulder had captured the daylight in some sort of complicated bioluminescent process. The moss looked soft and blue and silvery like a full moon floating at the top of the sky. 

Killua stood at the top of a ledge, looking down at the scooped out bowl of hillside that must have been created by some combination of the boulder's movement and some flowing glacier many millenniums ago. The heaving, rich soil smell of the forest fell away. Stepping carefully down the sides of the hill, he stepped into an illustration of space come to life. Light beyond reach, and the feeling of quiet on his skin. 

He saw the man in the moon. The silhouette of a young man teetering mere inches from his full adult height stood tall and broad against the base of this celestial monument. Unlike the enigmatic expression that Killua had been taught as a child to see when he tipped his head and squinted up at the sky, this man's clenched fists, and bent shoulders displayed clear misery.

"Gon?"

The silhouette turned. Lit from behind, the front didn't really look very different from the back. Thick, spikes black hair, a long neck holding up a head that turned upward towards the sound of his name. Two strong arms and two strong legs. 

Killua heard Gon's throat catch as he gulped, loudly. 

Killua couldn't see the expression on Gon's face, but Gon could see his. 

"You looked at me just like that. I remember now," Gon said. 

_The last time Killua saw Gon's silhouette, the air was filled with death and hate, when Gon's body transformed. Killua's body had transformed, too, into a live wire capable of only reacting. Protectively, fearfully, disgustedly._

"At first, when you let me..." Gon trailed off. Killua stepped closer. He couldn't see any clearer, but his words drew him like a magnet. "When I touched you, you made the same face."

Killua couldn't say anything. He kept walking, quiet step by quiet step, as Gon continued talking. 

"You also made the most amazing noises, and moved under my hand. I didn't know what to think. I would have known if you'd said no, but you didn't say no. You just looked..." Gon sounded wrung out. He'd had this conversation with himself every night since this began, Killua knew. 

"I thought maybe you looked that way because we're both guys, at first. I never thought I could do anything for a long time, because I didn't know..." Gon said. The sound he made next could have been a sob, or a laugh. "I thought about when I asked Kurapika," Gon said. Killua couldn't stay quiet any longer. 

"You asked Kurapika?!"

Killua had reached the bottom of the hill. He heard Gon laugh, now. 

"Well, I first asked him how I could find you."

_That solved the mystery of how Gon had suddenly appeared on their doorstep without notice, or a word of hello at any point in the two years prior._

"I asked him if my feelings were okay. Somehow, I knew Kurapika would know."

Killua felt a pulse of gratitude for their humorless, serious, wise beyond-his-years comrade from his first Hunter's Exam. 

"He told me that the only one who knew the answer was you, of course," Gon said. 

They stepped closer together at the base of the hill. The moon in the sky above, a thin curve like a thumb nail, and the moon on the ground behind, lit Gon's face with metallic candle light. His precisely carved cheekbones were fuller and softer. His long jaw, and muscular neck, and curved nose did remind Killua of that night 4 years ago. There was no way to avoid that.

Killua searched desperately for the words to explain the feelings Gon inspired in him now. How warm and kind and soft they were. How time apart had allowed him to fill in the cracks in his heart, and how much sturdier he felt now, as a result. 

Gon was so careful now. Careful with his words, careful with his intentions. His mouth, and voice, and hands. 

Gon had really been so brave. Killua had to close the distance, now. 

"I remember the first time, Gon," Killua said. 

He almost couldn't hear himself, but knew Gon would have no trouble. 

They continued walking closer, until they were barely an arm's length apart. Killua let his eyes float up and around, until it focused on a patch of glowing moss on the boulder behind Gon's shoulder. It looked like a crater filled with shadows. 

"I remember feeling really overwhelmed, but, also, so..." Killua gulped. "Fucking happy." 

Gon's warm, wordless sound propped up Killua's heart. 

"I felt like you were giving me something precious, every night. And, I felt..." Killua stopped. He remembered Gon's mouth, his soft breath. His hands moved from his face to his neck like rough, hot leather. Killua remembered his own hands reaching out, with no destination in mind, simply hoping to explore the gift of Gon's body. 

"When you kept pushing me away, I felt awful. You said you didn't need me," Killua looked Gon in the eyes. Gon's uncertain smile faded into a serious, set line. 

_"I want to do this," Gon had said, when he pushed Killua's hand away. "I don't need you to do anything for me."_

The words poked and prodded against the cage of Killua's heart. Gon's eyes widened, and he looked down.

"Oh," was all Gon could say. 

"I want you to need me, Gon," Killua said. He'd almost never admitted something so plainly before in his life. Always, it seemed, he was forced to make these admissions about Gon. 

"But," Gon started. "But, if I am not careful, you just get hurt. If I'm not careful, now, you're going to get hurt again. I can't handle that, Killua," Gon said. His full, deep and rich voice, creaked like he was 14 again.

"When I think about you touching me," Gon said, and then sighed. Killua held his breath. Gon continued, "All I can think about is when I lost control."

Killua felt himself exhale, quickly, and breath in, quicker still. Killua had planned on avoiding this topic for as long as he could. He figured that "the rest of conceivable time" would be just long enough.

Killua thought about the night Gon gave up control. Often. More often than he would ever let Gon, or his sister, or anybody else, know. He woke up covered in freezing cold sweat. The darkness of his bedroom filled his nose and mouth until it felt like he was drowning.

The details of Gon's face, lit by shadows and moonlight, focused Killua's memories like the lens of a camera.

"I feel like I fill up with something fast, and hot, and I just feel like I'm pulled back to that night. I still can't really remember that night," Gon said. "I just feel things. I feel lost, and scared. I stop paying attention to anything around me. I just think about what I want. I feel like I won't be able to stop."

Gon had willingly sacrificed his future on the altar of rage that night. He'd transformed all of the potential power he would ever access for the ability to destroy one opponent in one moment. Killua had been too late to help, too insignificant to make his best friend understand why he should protect his own value.

What Gon had wanted that night was to kill his opponent. Kill his guilt. Kill his mistakes. Kill his future.

The difference did not occur to Killua immediately. He had to find his breath again. He had to fight the churning in his stomach, and meet Gon's eyes.

Killua saw how Gon's eyes looked in the darkness. Killua remembered that first night, two months ago, when Gon held Killua's head to his chest, as Killua tried to pick himself back up after Gon's hands and mouth broke them into euphoric pieces. He rediscovered Gon's eyes. Gon looked at him like he wanted to be nowhere else. Like holding Killua was all he'd ever wanted.

Killua fell asleep in Gon's arms. He woke up in a new world. His sleep had been quiet, and during the night he'd forgotten what scared him about the darkness. The memories left him alone. Together, they built new memories, and it filled Killua's days, and nights. 

The realization saturated his mouth and throat. He couldn't keep it to himself, now. 

"What if I..." Killua said. He felt his voice go quiet. At first, it feels like fear. Then, he realized, it was excitement.

"What if I don't want you to stop?"

Gon's mouth opened. Killua's jaw tightened, and he planted both feet firmly.

"Killua, that doesn't make any sense," Gon said, finally. He sounded confused, but Gon's eyes became two celestial bodies of their own, golden and heavy like rare hunter's moons.

"You don't get to decide what I want, Gon," Killua said. "I get to decide that. And, fuck, Gon, I want you."

Gon's pink tongue darted out of his parted lips. It was too much to resist.

Killua needed to only tilt his head down ever so slightly, and Gon needed only to glance up for the briefest moment for their lips to meet. Killua wanted so much more, but first he had to ask. He had to help Gon understand.

"I want all of you," Killua said, when their lips parted. He breathed it into Gon's mouth, as he held his hands in quaking fists at his sides. Gon wrapped his hands around Killua's wrists.

"You aren't the same person you were then, Gon," Killua whispered. He kissed Gon's cheek. Gon gasped low, and slid his hands up Killua's forearms. They moved closer together, until Killua felt nothing else except the firm press of Gon's chest.

"I'm not going to let you do something you regret, again," Killua said. He dug his nails into the skin of his palms, and bent his face so he could brush his lips under Gon's jaw. Gon moaned. Killua could feel as his mouth opened. The pleasure conveyed in the sounds Gon made threatened to knock Killua to his knees.

"Killua?" Gon said, suddenly, and Killua felt the pad of Gon's thumb brush against his neck. It stung. "This...I did this, right?"

The wound had stopped bleeding many minutes before. Killua felt like all of his will power would bleed away if Gon didn't stop touching him there.

"It was just a little blood, Gon."

"I hurt you," Gon said. Killua felt Gon's breath on his neck.

"I've had worse," Killua said. That was true, and it was a lie. Right now, as Gon's mouth hovered above his skin, felt more intense and overwhelming than any measly dose of pain.

Gon's lips touched the torn skin. The sensation tickled, and floated somewhere between a kiss, and an accident.

"What if I go too far?" Gon asked. His wrapped his hands around Killua's back.

"What if you don't go far enough?" Killua said, slowly, lips touching Gon's ear. Gon shuddered, and his voice shook.

"What if I can't stop?" Gon asked, again. Killua trapped Gon's sensitive earlobe between his lips. Two wide hands gripped Killua's shirt. He could feel the fabric strain near to tearing.

Killua uncurled his lips, and he knew he had teeth. He smirked.

"Idiot. You don't think I could stop you?" Killua said. He bit Gon's ear. Pure pleasure mixed with pain in Gon's mouth. It escaped as explosive noise. He howled and moaned, and the night air laved Killua's skin as Gon's hands twisted Killua's shirt up his back. When he could take no more, Gon pulled his head free. Killua exhaled, and looked at him.

Two glowing embers floated above Gon's panting mouth. Gon gasped as his lungs forced air into and out of his body. 

"You promise you'll stop me?" Gon said. He pleaded. His voice sounded bloody. 

"I promise," Killua said, thickly. His hands shook. "Do you promise to trust me?"

Gon looked at his own hands. Killua looked at them, too, and then reached for them. The pads of his fingertips brushed over the thin skin sheathing Gon's blue veins. Gon gasped, and let out a long, sweet sound. 

"Yes..."

"I really don't think..." Killua said. He bent his finger, and began digging his nails into the sensitive skin of Gon's upturned arm. Gon moaned.

"...that anything you want is..." Killua growled, and gripped the wrist. Gon grunted like he'd been punched. 

"...any different than exactly what I want." Killua threw his head up, and moved his hands faster than the eye could track. He pulled Gon's arms apart, and up over Gon's head. Gon gulped in air between moaning cries. Keeping tight hold of Gon's wrists, Killua pressed his lips to Gon's forehead. 

"This, right?" Killua whispered. Gon nodded. 

Killua moved his lips down. He kissed Gon's nose, his cheeks, and his eyelids in turn. Softly. He felt Gon's hands curl and stretch. He squeezed the wrists. 

"This, too?" Killua asked. Gon nodded, furiously, and his mouth opened. Killua held firm against Gon's straining arms. It reminded Killua of countless hours of sparring. Hundreds and hundreds of times he's learned about the limits of Gon's body as they practiced martial skills together. 

Gon was straining to keep himself in check. Killua smirked. He knew Gon could go further. 

"Oh, but what about this?" Killua asked, again. He uncovered his teeth, and gently bit into the soft skin of Gon's neck. 

"That's..." Gon cried. "Oh, Killua..."

Killua's blood pumped in his hands and face. 

"Too much?"

Gon shook his head.

"It's...good..." Gon said, through his own teeth, as his lips quivered. 

Killua's tongue peeked out, and tasted Gon's straining neck. Gon threw his neck back as he shivered. 

"Mmm?" 

"Kill..."

"Good?"

"Kill....llua," Gon said. He tipped his chin forward, and Killua dodged out of the way. Killua stepped back. 

Gon's arms were bare. The arms of his shirt slid down his shoulders as his arms continued to point straight into the sky. Gon's eyes were tightly closed. Killua could see Gon's skin wrinkle with the effort of containing whatever was happening inside.

Killua knew he could take more. He looked up at Gon's straining hands. He turned Gon's palms until they faced each other.

"Gon, hold on, and stay still, okay?"

Gon slowly opened his eyes. Killua could see his Adam's apple bounce as he swallowed. Killua pressed Gon's hands together. He aligned the fingers just so, and curled them together, until Gon was holding his own hands above his head. 

The position Gon's arms were in now should have made him look awkward, and off kilter. However, posed with all of the strength of his arms and legs on full display, the silver flowing from two moons coating gold brown skin in shimmery, unfocused light, looked like something out of a painting. It looked like a work of art.

Made him realize the genius of Gon's photography plans. 

"You okay?" Killua asked, with a smirk. 

Gon's eyes narrowed. He frowned, slightly.

"You're mean, Killua."

"Yeah, but you knew that already," Killua replied. He felt the current of his pulse in his own wrists. "I'm going to keep going, so get ready."

Gon set his mouth in a serious line. 

"I'm ready!" Gon said, like he was getting ready for Killua to punch him in the face.

Killua had significantly more fun plans. 

Gravel and stones shifted under Killua's feet. He realized how quiet the forest around them was where they stood. How dreamy, and unstuck in time it all felt. It required following Gon out into the darkness of a forest transformed into the night sky for Gon to allow him to finally return some tiny fraction of what Gon had given him in the last two months.

First, though.

The cotton felt rough in Killua's hand compared to the smooth, slick surface of Gon's abs. Killua was in no hurry. Gon's stomach rolled and twitched under Killua's slow fingers. His firm, defined muscles still caused him to jump and snort with every stray flick of Killua's fingers.

"Fuck, you're ridiculously ticklish, dude. I'm barely touching you," Killua breathed out, pleased and heady with how something so simple could be so deeply satisfying.

"Ugh, Killua, it's extra...aaaaah....it's extra hard not to be when I'm standing like this."

Grabbing the hem of Gon's shirt, Killua pulled it up, and over Gon's head. Gon bounced from foot to foot as the shirt brushed over his face. Killua got on his tip toes to bring it over Gon's clasped hands. Gon's fingers were still stitched together.

"Um, should I...?" Gon asked, fingers starting to loosen, but Killua stopped him with a wet, heavy kiss. Gon's mouth yielded, instantly, and Killua reached around to grab with both hands. He pulled the shirt up Gon's arms. It soon wrapped itself up and over Gon's clasped fingers.

"No," Killua said, finally, as he pulled back from Gon's lips and tongue. "Just stay like that. It's working, right? You've been such a good boy for me so far."

"Ohhh," Gon breathed out, deeply.

Gon's eyes looked full and heavy, and still so, so hungry. Killua felt that what he was looking at, really, was himself reflected in those big, golden orbs.

"You're so good, Gon," Killua said, softly. To himself as much as to Gon. It was a benediction, a reminder, a prayer of thanks. Gon whimpered, and bit his bottom lip. Killua had to slow down his breathing, consciously, and swipe his tongue over his lips, before he could continue.

Killua released his grip on the shirt. He left it behind to serve as thin, flimsy, irresistible handcuffs.

Killua slid his hands down Gon's full and thick forearms next. He lingered, briefly, on the underside of Gon's upper arms, as Gon's hands drifted down towards the back of his head. The elbows fell away from Gon's ears until the arms formed a triangle behind Gon's head.

Giggles, and then more snorts. Gon's arms were made of gold-plated steel, but brushing his thumb against the silky soft skin made Gon wiggle and move his hips.

"No, Killua, ah, no!" Gon said, laughing. Killua heard the no, and pulled his hands away. He'd file that spot away for another time.

More importantly, with Gon's shirt up and out of the way, Killua couldn't avoid the roiling, life altering reality of Gon's naked chest and stomach.

He'd seen it almost every night, and always had to keep his hands to himself. Without fail, any touch he attempted would result in Gon flinching of reach, or playfully grabbing his hand, and holding it away from their bodies.

Now, the hardest decision Killua currently faced was where to start.

Gon's torso was painted with all of the shades of a red stone landscape. Dusty browns, with shades of dark rust. Two small, peach-colored circles were topped by firm nipples. Drawn like magnets, Killua's thumbs found both tiny peaks. He drew slow rings around each one.

Gon's mouth dropped open. His pink tongue threatened to loll out.

"You're SO good, Gon," Killua whispered, to himself.

Gon's chest began to sway with the rhythm of Killua's touch. Left, and right. If Killua had been able to pretend he could hold it all together, that started to fall apart as Gon's silhouette moved back and forth under his hands.

"Okay?" Killua said, a touch louder.

"Oh, um, I think so?" Gon said, sounding genuinely confused. His eyes were twisted closed, as his mouth tried to voice the confusion he felt. "That feels really weird, and also really good, but I am still okay."

Killua was not okay, but he could chew on his tongue, and still his hands, and play pretend. He nodded, even though Gon couldn't see him.

Killua's long, ghostly white fingers slipped down Gon's brown skin. The parts they covered looked like blurs left behind by some eraser. Void, and nothing.

Killua felt everything, and he felt it all at once.

Gon's mouth and hands had made Killua coil up with pleasure, until he felt himself explode in every direction, for weeks. He smashed apart under gentle, firm, insistent, tender warmth.

In comparison, feeling Gon move under his hand, feeling Gon begin to unravel, felt strong and affirming. Like he was building something powerful, and good. Like he was starting to repair something that broke a long time ago.

His hands reached the fly of Gon's shorts. Gon's stomach sucked in, and on cue Gon released a loud breath.

"Oh, Killua..." Gon muttered.

Killua didn't touch the shorts, yet. He started by brushing the tips of his thumbnails over the skin above the waistband.

The sight of the deep grooves of Gon's defined stomach muscles pounded hard against the door deep in Killua's body that guarded his self-control. Killua searched the grooves out, and dipped his fingers into them, and over them. This must have felt half ticklish, half pleasurable, as Gon moved away from the fingers, and then curved back.

He wanted to learn everything he could about what Gon found pleasurable. About what Gon found unbearable. 

"Still good, yes?"

Wordless, desperate moans. Killua smiled. He bent over, and unbuttoned Gon's fly. Gon's hips moved. No, they definitely bucked. Killua looked up. Gon's mouth was open, and his eyes were closed, both like his life depended on it. 

Killua gripped the fabric of Gon's shorts tightly. He saw his knuckles turn pink, and then white, with the force of his grip. The heat in his lower belly traveled up and down, in pulsing, alternating, rhythmic waves. He pulled the shorts down, freeing them from Gon's powerful muscles. They slid down to Gon's feet. Gon stepped out of them, immediately, making Killua gasp with excitement. 

"Mmm, this okay?" Killua asked.

"Yes, yes, don't stop," Gon rasped. 

The light blue fabric of Gon's boxers looked less like cheap cotton, and more like some magical, ethereal weave made from gossamer dew drops, or some fucking thing. The blood in Killua's body was not concentrated in his brain right now, he considered in a dizzying rush, as he took in this overwhelming sight. 

One finger was all it took to start to break apart their collective willpower. 

Killua started at the tip of Gon's bulge. Already wet, already hot, and so firm. The gap in his boxers opened ever so slightly. Killua slipped his fingertip inside, and explored first hand the amazing sights from earlier in the evening. 

Such soft skin. Softer than any other part of Gon he'd touched, yet. So, so hard. 

Killua realized that Gon's cock looked different because it was uncut. The soft, highly sensitive foreskin had only just started to slip back from his slippery, shining red glans. He continued to use one finger, alone, to try to understand this fascinating development. 

Killua had only touched his own, before. He'd only ever wanted to touch Gon's. It felt like he had years of catching up to do. 

Killua gently pressed his finger into the gap left by the parting brown skin. Gon made a sound almost like a hiccup. A throaty, needy sob. 

"Mmmm, yes?" Killua asked. He paused. Gon's hips definitely, definitely bucked forward. Inches from Killua's lips. 

"One thing at a time, dude," Killua whispered, trying to hide his moan. He had to keep it together. For Gon's sake, he had to do that much. 

His finger started swirling, slowly, against the red tip, and over the soft skin, and then down the sides. Marking a long, slow trail around and around, until he reached the base. Gon's coarse, curly black hair covered his lower belly. Killua slipped the finger inside of it, and drew sloppy circles. Still just one finger. Gon started to groan.

"Killua, I can't?" Gon asked. He seemed to be unable to summon exactly what it was he couldn't do, and hoped Killua would have the answer. 

"You can't what?" Killua said. He breathed, mere centimeters from Gon's iron rod of an erection. Killua didn't know if he could either. Both of them felt the ground fall away. They both felt hungry, and dangerous, and tender with the rising temperature of their blood under their skin. Killua quickly slid the boxers off Gon's hips. Perfect.

Killua pressed his lips to Gon's hardness. Gon's hands swung up, and over. The gripping fists slammed into Killua's shoulder. Killua groaned, and Gon groaned. 

"Killua, I can't, I'm sorry, I...I..." Gon stuttered. 

Killua poked his tongue out, and pressed it to the salty, warm, soft skin of the head of Gon's cock. He mumbled, and reached around, to grab the back of Gon's thighs. He caressed Gon in response to that thud of pain. The pain felt like nothing, and Gon's pleasure felt like everything. 

Gon struggled to keep his hands together. Gon's chest bent over the top of Killua's head. The fabric of Gon's shirt rubbed against Killua's neck and bare shoulders. Entangled, and straining to contain his feelings.

More and more of Gon slid between Killua's lips. Too much. Killua was up for the challenge. He didn't really know what he was doing, but Gon had regularly demonstrated expertise over the last two months, so Killua felt like he had some valuable experience to lean on, at least. 

Building a consistent pace, Killua moved his tongue softly, in a slithering, unexpected pattern. The taste of Gon was rich, earthy, salty, and a touch sweet. New and exciting. Killua feasted eagerly. Gon had lost control of his voice. Moans and grunts escaped in tandem with Killua's darting tongue, and sliding lips. 

"Killua..." Gon whispered, finally. Gon's hips had started moving, desperately. "I think I'm going to...Oh..."

Killua paused, and considered. He hoped he'd get a chance to finish this, another time. He just knew now this wasn't where he wanted to stop. He knew Gon could still go further, with him. 

Killua wanted more. Deliriously so. So intensely his head swam with it. He slipped his mouth off. Gon's clasping hands caught Killua's head gently, as he leaned back to look up. 

"Not yet," Killua whispered. "We can go farther, right, Gon?"

Gon's eyes opened. Cradling Killua's head, they considered each other fully, for a long time. Gon panted. 

"I want to try," Gon said. 

"Me too," Killua said. He tried to smile, but his breath came too full and heavy for that. 

Killua turned his head, and kissed Gon's wrist, as Gon lowered himself to his knees in front of Killua. He continued to hold Killua's head. 

Killua turned his head. His face lined up evenly with Gon's as Gon crouched on his knees in front of him. 

"Fuck," Killua said, too quickly to pull it back in. He felt himself flush redder than he'd been all night. 

Gon's eyes were soft, and heavy. His cheeks were pink, and shining with a silvery sheen of sweat. Gon's lips were a dark, rosy gold. A line of bright white teeth darted out. Gon bit his bottom lip until they began to glow red. He looked exquisite. 

Killua felt his lust step aside, for one moment, and the awe Gon inspired in him took over.

"You are beautiful," Killua said, reverently, and sincerely. It was true, it was more true than anything else Killua had ever said. He hadn't meant to say it, really. He peeled his chest open to reveal his beating red heart with the words. 

Gon's eyes widened, until sparkles appeared on the surface. Killua blushed, in response, at Gon's look of surprise. Not just surprise.

"Killua, don't be mean," Gon said. He frowned. "I'm not..." 

"Gon?" Killua asked. "I'm not..."

Gon looked down. The shimmer turned into tears. 

"Gon!?"

"Don't just say things, Killua, if you don't mean them."

Killua felt his heart quake inside his body. 

"I'm not lying, Gon," Killua said. Gon's head had tipped forward. Killua reached up. He gently pressed his bent forefinger under Gon's chin. Two lines of tears slid down Gon's face. 

"But..." Gon said. His lip gently quivered. Killua gulped. He brought his free hand up to Gon's face. He gently swiped away one line of tears with his thumb, and then the other. 

"You..." Killua whispered. He leaned forward, and kissed Gon's forehead.

"Are..." Killua continued. He pressed his lips to Gon's nose, and eyelids. His lips felt the wetness of Gon's tears. 

"So..." Killua hummed. He kissed the tears off of Gon's cheeks softly. 

" _Fucking_ beautiful." 

Gon's eyes stayed closed. Killua pulled his lips back, and pressed his forehead to Gon's. 

"Okay?" 

Gon's lips parted. Killua felt Gon's hands unclasp, and relax behind his neck. The shirt fell down Killua's back. 

One of Gon's hands was almost large enough to hold the back of Killua's entire head. Killua felt suddenly, deliciously small as five powerful fingers entwined with Killua's hair. 

"Okay," Gon said, simply. One quick exhale of affirmation. His eyes opened. 

Killua saw the heat from every star in the sky burning in Gon's eyes. 

A sharp tug pulled Killua's head back. Gon's mouth tilted, and covered the peak of Killua's bent neck. Two lines of teeth encircled Killua's windpipe. 

"Oh!" Killua groaned. He felt one hand grip his left wrist, and then another grip his right. With a heavy pound, Killua's back landed against the rocky ground. 

Gon pinned Killua's arms above his head. Killua pulled his legs together as Gon's thighs climbed atop of them. Gon's body became one long arc of pressure above Killua.

The difference between Gon now, and Gon earlier in the night, and every previous night, set off claps of thunder in Killua's chest. His belly filled with ravenous fire. 

Those two golden moons became as bright as suns. Killua couldn't look at them without blinking. 

"Gon?"

Gon lowered his hips against Killua's body. Slowly. So fucking slow. So astoundingly slow that it felt like Killua was drowning as he watched Gon's flawless body curve down, and against him. 

"Gon, are you...?"

"Shhhh..."

Gon's full lips kissed him hard. Two strong hands squeezed his wrists even harder. 

The fire inside of him danced like Gon's kisses were oxygen. Killua spread his legs, and Gon's hips closed the space between. He ground into Killua with such blatant lust that Killua actually barked out a laugh. Gon pulled back, his fire eyes narrowing. 

"Trying to tell me something, Gon?"

"I want..."

Killua wanted it, too. He'd wanted it forever. He never felt brave enough to say the words until now. 

"I want you to fuck me, too, Gon."

"Oh..." Gon moaned, wordlessly. His mouth almost seemed to grimace. He looked like Killua just asked him a complicated math problem. Confused, and overwhelmed.

Plus or minus the erection, of course. 

"You gotta let go of my hands, though," Killua said. He tried to sound controlled, and playful. He tried to sound like he wasn't burning up. "Because I promised I'd stop you, okay? If things get out of hand."

"Yeah," Gon said. Killua felt Gon release his wrists. The confusion began to transform Gon's eyes. They narrowed. Gon's mouth softened. "Promise?"

Not all of the blood had left Killua's brain, after all, as inspiration struck.

"You want to, Gon?"

Killua's voice was bloody, needy, heavy and only barely in control. 

"Want to..."

"Fuck me?"

"Want to....fuck Killua...?"

Gon saying that word threatened to undo everything. Killua gulped. Gon looked like he only half understood the words he was saying, but his hips continued grinding. 

Killua unwrapped his legs, and planted both feet on the ground. He lifted his hips, and bravely ignored the bulging heat of Gon's hard cock. He sat up, and Gon scrambled back, until he was straddling Killua's lap.

"Then you gotta earn it," Killua hissed into Gon's ear. He wrapped his arms around Gon's back. Gon's eyes flickered. 

"Earn it...?"

Killua ran his nails up Gon's back. He hooked his arms around Gon's shoulders. He lifted his hips again, and moved forward. Gon fell backward. He landed, and released the breath he was holding. 

"Gotta take it," Killua mumbled. He felt the hard planes and vulnerable heat of Gon's body under him. He knew he was reaching Gon's breaking point, and couldn't be more thrilled. 

Gon's hands moved to Killua's back. They were searching for something. Killua's hands knew exactly what they wanted. 

First, Gon's arms. That ticklish under arm. Gon laughed, and bucked, and shoved Killua's hands away. They moved easily to Gon's sides. Feeling the edge of Gon's body. Gon wriggled under Killua's hips. Killua pressed back until the only thing separating Gon's hardness from Killua's was basketball shorts, and thin, stretchy fabric. 

"Killua!" Gon shouted, despite himself. He moved his hands under Killua's shirt. 

"Gon?" Killua replied, smirking. He reached behind, and felt for Gon's hands on his back. Gon fingers were snaking up Killua's back. Through the fabric, Killua gripped Gon's fingers. 

If it hadn't been made clear to Gon before, the sudden grip of strength, the pressure from Killua's eyes, the subtle shift in energy made it abundantly clear.

This was a challenge. Nothing helped Gon rise to the occasion faster. 

Faster than even Killua could have anticipated, Gon loosened his fingers from Killua's grip. Gon lifted the shirt up and over Killua's head so quickly that Killua's arms flew in the air. Gon pulled, and Killua tipped over. Their bare chests collided, and Gon crushed his lips against Killua as he pulled the shirt away from Killua's arms. 

The kiss distracted Killua while Gon kept moving. He reached down, and jammed both thumbs under Killua's waistband. Killua felt himself instinctively lift his hips, making Gon's job easier. 

"Killua...you can't make this too easy," Gon said, against Killua's lips. The sound was serious, but Killua knew Gon was smiling. Killua blushed so intensely he could feel it. 

The shorts and boxers were already past his hips, but Killua reached down and grabbed Gon's hands before they could move any farther. 

Gon strained, and Killua pulled. 

Gon pulled his lips back from his teeth, and hummed. Killua growled. 

Gon lifted both of them up as he bent forward to sit up. Killua pushed against his shoulders. Gon reached up, and gripped Killua's wrists. Gon twisted them back behind Killua's back. Killua tilted his head, and swiped his tongue up the side of Gon's neck, and over the curl of his ear. 

It wasn't quite a fight, but it was definitely a competition. Gon's body shuddered. Killua lost all ability to speak. They both throbbed as they built this new world together. 

The way Gon held his hands behind his back, he knew he'd have to get serious to break free. He strained, a little, and Gon pushed back. That twisted inside Killua's belly just like Gon's hands twisted up his arms. He tried to dip his head down, to continue teasing Gon's neck. Gon moved faster. Gon moved with so much determination that Killua felt everything twitch. 

Gon kissed Killua's jawline. That spot made Killua shiver. Gon found the line of Killua's collarbone, and followed it with his tongue. Killua's back arched. Without realizing it, his muscled unfolded as Gon pushed him flat against the forest floor. 

The rocks abraded Killua's back. The sweet injustice of it made him groan.

"You're a fucking cheater, Gon," Killua whispered. Gon laughed, deeply, even though he was not at all joking around, now. Gon's lips floated down to Killua's right nipple. No pretense needed now. Gon already knew how this worked. He bit down, hard. 

"Fucking cheater," Killua hissed.

Losing now didn't seem so bad, though. Gon's knees and feet curled up, and Killua realized Gon just used his toes to remove Killua's shorts. 

"Fucking monster," Killua hummed, quickly. Without thinking. Gon reached for Killua's hands. Not his wrists. Killua felt their fingers entwine. Gon squeezed, hard. 

"If I was...you'd stop me," Gon said, with his mouth pressed against Killua's chest. Over his heart. Killua felt like it was beating directly into Gon's mouth. 

Killua bent his head down, and pressed his lips into Gon's hair. "If you were, I'd just come with you," Killua said. "We could destroy Yorkshin City together, just you and me." 

Gon's erection twitched. Killua felt him align their hips just so. The friction turned Killua's vision dark. He squeezed Gon's hands as hard as he could. Gon squeezed back.

"I'll just..." Gon panted. Killua felt one of Gon's hands release his own. "...start here..."

Gon didn't just grab Killua's cock. He wrapped his hands directly around every fervent, desperate, sweaty night Killua spent wishing for it, and hating himself for wishing for it. 

"...in my path of destruction." 

Gon leaned back. He released his other hand. Killua wasn't sure he could talk, or move more than his head. Gon's eyes connected with his. 

A question. Killua nodded. The answer. 

Gon crooked his free hand under Killua's knee. He lifted the leg. He tilted hips up, and sat back on his knees. 

Killua bent his head up. His fingers curled into the ground. Rocks and dirt filled his palms. He didn't notice. 

"I know this isn't exactly how you're supposed to do it," Gon said. 

His fist gripped Killua's body like it was his anchor. He reached over with his free hand to the other leg, and gently slid the thigh out, and up. Killua pulled his knees up. He knew he was totally exposed, and covered in splotches of red embarrassment. Gon's eyes swallowed him whole. 

"How...how do you know about what's supposed to happen?" Killua sputtered. 

"Kurapika," Gon replied, easily. 

"Gon, stop talking...." Killua pleaded.

"No way, you get harder every time I do." 

"You still don't have to mention Kurapika!"

"Fair," Gon said. He finally let Killua go. Both hands slid to Killua's waist. Such big hands. Killua was taller, but Gon was bigger in every other sense. 

Killua gulped. Every sense. 

"But, I think we'll be okay," Gon said. He set one palm on Killua's inner thigh. He placed his other, calloused middle finger against Killua's cleft. He slipped inside. Killua gasped. Gon didn't pause. He pressed, and waited for the sensitive skin to allow him entrance. 

Killua's toes curled. He squeezed the rocks in his hands so hard they began to sting. 

"Oh, Killua, this is..." Gon said, and Killua didn't know what it was, either, except that it was good. Better than good. Gon didn't stop, and Killua felt pinned in place with pleasure. 

"More?" Gon asked. Killua nodded. He saw Gon's shoulders and arms move slowly against the glow of the giant blue sphere behind. 

More meant more, and all of it all of a sudden. More of everything. Gon slipped another of his huge, impossibly huge, (when the fuck did they get so huge?) fingers inside. Killua gasped. Gon paused, but didn't stop. 

_I can take it, Gon_

Gon slid his other hand toward Killua's core. He ran his thumb over the soft white fuzz, and skin. Killua bucked up. Gon pressed down, holding him in place. 

Both fingers started to gently move. Then less gently. Every thrust blasted up Killua's spine, into his head, and left his mouth in a snarl. 

"More..." said Gon, now. Not a question. No questions any more. Killua opened his hands. He leaned up, and gripped Gon's arms. The way they felt in his hands as Gon's hands moved was the last straw.

"No, no more, just fucking DO IT."

Gon looked up from the focused attention he was paying to his own hands.

Two pillars of fire. Gon's curved smile. That pink tongue peeking out, again. 

Killua pulled himself into Gon's lap, and grabbed both of Gon's ears. He smashed their lips together. Gon's hands gripped his hips, and slid down to his ass. 

It wasn't ideal. It would be better next time. The many, many other next times. But right now, as Gon pulled Killua apart, and slipped them together, it was right. 

The stinging heat, the hungry movements, the hands that threatened to claw a brown leather back to strips of fleshy ribbons. Bruising fuchsia spots on a pale neck born under rose pink lips and teeth that weren't careful at all. 

Two giant hands moving Killua's hips as fast as they could manage.

It was very fast.

It was over faster than either of them wanted.

Gon laughed, and Killua felt wet tears slide down his cheek where their faces rested against each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The conclusion will come soon! This chapter took me SO MUCH TIME. But I know what the ending is going to be already. It will be sweet, fluffly, and not nearly so long. Hope you enjoy this chapter! Thanks for reading!


	6. Treasure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this wasn't shorter at all. But I hope you like it, all the same. More sexy shenanigans, and some fluff to finish things. And some bittersweet. Thank you for reading through to the end!
> 
> ETA: I totally forgot the first little chunk of the story, just added it back in. Thanks for nothing copy + paste function. Anyway, thanks for reading!

"Killua?"

"Hmmmm?"

"No, Killua, you gotta open your eyes."

A caterpillar crawled down Killua's nose. Or maybe a dragonfly floated nearby. His nose curled up in a sneeze.

"Even Killua's sneezes are cute," said that drowsy, velvet voice.

"Gon, stop being such a noisy weirdo," Killua mumbled with heavy, sleepy lips.

One eye opened, and light forced him to blink. The other opened with a flutter.

An eclipse blocked the light, so Killua could finally open his eyes.

Above him, Gon looked brown and blue and purple. His face looked ink-stained. Or, maybe, like a black and white photo. He had his head propped up on his fist. His finger had been the caterpillar. It pressed in the tip of Killua's nose like a button. His smile flashed. Teeth lined up like a white flag of surrender. Except, whatever the opposite was of that, as Gon's lips forced Killua's mouth open, and his tongue invaded. Or did it come home?

Killua inwardly shuddered at what a ridiculously sappy thought that was.

"Gon," Killua whispered into that soft, rose gold mouth. "Gon? What time is it?"

Another routine they'd established. Gon always woke up before Killua. Killua never used to sleep regularly, so he never realized how terrible he was at waking up.

"I think we've been asleep for a few hours. 3 or 4, I'd guess, based on the location of the moon," Gon responded.

The black figure cut from construction paper, and labeled "perfect example of the stereotypical, male form" was Gon Freecs. That figure sat up, stretched his arms, reached down to find his toes, and stood up.

He was totally naked.

Killua was totally naked, too. On the ground. He felt the rocks, the sticks, and a wet, cold something pressing into his back and ass and thighs.

Both sides of Killua's neck stung. He sat up, and crossed his arms in front of his chest to discover the source of the sensations.

His fingertips found patches of dried blood, scrapes of rough skin, and long, thin, raised abrasions. Every tingle of pain made him shiver. His fingers rested on one particularly tender spot. He felt very distinct bite marks plunged into the white skin of his neck. 

He shivered, and breathed out a quiet "Oh..."

He was still naked. He looked down at himself. Gon laughed. Joyfully, but also bashfully, like it snuck out of him by surprise.

"Um, you came...really hard...when I did that."

Killua shot to his feet, and felt his mouth gape as he looked at Gon. The memory pulsed through his body like a wave of sea sickness.

"Oh my god! G-gon!"

Gon's laughed with his whole body. He grabbed his stomach. His eyes stayed on Killua the whole time. Darkness turned everything else into a distant mystery, but Gon's eyes and body were lit up from within, like a muscle-bound light bulb.

"3 or 4 hours..." Killua mouthed, trying to keep his mind moving instead of suffocating under the weight of Gon's half-lidded eyes.

The heavy shackles of sleep started to loosen, and Killua turned to find his pants, underwear, and shirt on the ground a few meters away.

Gon had seen him naked countless times. Well, he could probably count them, but even now, even as he felt Gon's eyes on him again, yet again, it felt as vulnerable and near helpless as that first time. At least he could still manage to dress himself.

"Aww..." Gon said, faking disappointment as Killua pulled on his pants, and shirt.

"3 or 4 hours..." Killua repeated, bending up. Clothes offered a pretense of dignity, at least. He turned, and Gon just stood there, indecently. Every flex of muscle appearing on his body as deep, contrasting waves of darkness and gold.

The moon behind them, the giant, earthbound one, had begun to fade to a barely resonate glimmer. Night really must be close to over now. The forest had woken up, as well, with the faint chirping of birds in the distance.

That very darkest time of the night. 3 or 4 hours had passed...

"Oh, shit, Alluka!"

Gon's smile faded.

"Is everything okay?"

Killua ran past Gon, and dropped to his knees. He tossed shorts and underwear and a shirt directly at Gon's dopey, flawless face.

"Fuck, please just put your clothes on. Gah, I totally forgot."

"Forgot what?" Gon said, muffle, as he slipped his shirt over his head.

"I asked Nanika and Alluka to transport me to wherever she was in 6 hours, if I wasn't home," Killua explained. He felt a million times better once both of them were dressed.

"You asked Nanika?" Gon asked. Gon's voice turned Killua around on his heels. Gon was fastening the button on his fly, and frowning.

"Yes, right before..." Killua replied, stiffly.

"You never ask Nanika to use her power," Gon interrupted. Killua heard Gon gulp. His own mouth felt gross, and dry.

"I don't like to leave Alluka alone at night. I had to make an exception."

"You made an exception to come find me?" Gon asked.

Killua's lips puckered. He tipped his head towards the ever so slightly brighter and brighter blue of the night sky.

"Well, yeah."

"I'm..." Gon finished fumbling with the button on his shorts, and stood up. "I'm sorry, Killua."

Killua bit his bottom lip. He shook his head.

"Don't be," Killua mumbled. Gon shook his head, too, faster.

"No, that was...I was being really dumb last night. I'm sorry."

"Well, you can make it up to me by hustling back to the apartment, so Alluka doesn't see us with forest grime in our fucking sex hair."

Gon chuckled. He moved close, and fast. Arms encircled Killua's shoulders. Gon jammed his nose and mouth against curly hair at the back of Killua's neck.

"I love you, Killua," Gon said. His arms squeezed tight.

Killua's arms hung limp at his sides. He pointed his fingers straight at the ground. They shook.

He knew that. He'd known that. Of course he did. Hearing Gon say it was another thing.

Gon held him, and didn't move. Didn't seem to be expecting anything from Killua, either.

Killua wrapped his arms up, and around Gon's arms. He pressed his mouth against the curl of his hand covering Gon's upper arm.

"You can't just say shit you don't mean, Gon."

Gon kissed his neck.

"Of course not."

Killua rubbed his eyes with his hands. Shit. It was still late, and his eyes watered, and fucking Gon was still so warm. Gon's arms were his favorite. Fuck.

He was a little sad they were now dressed, he couldn't lie.

"Let's go," Killua said, finally. He unwrapped his hands, and Gon unwrapped his arms. Gon nodded. His smile was so wide that it looked like it must be hurting his face.

Killua leaned forward, and awkwardly brushed his nose against Gon's. He kissed the corner of Gon's mouth, and spun around.

Gon laughed, and chased Killua up the hill.

\----

Killua had his keys out, and had nearly slotted them into the lock when a rush of sickening, swirling white clouded his vision. He saw nothing, but felt his legs collapse underneath him. He woke with a thud, as hard wood floor pressed stiffly against his butt and thighs, and the bright light of the ceiling fan's light tried to blind him.

Apparently Killua had just missed the deadline. His hands still held the keys to the front door. Alluka had to jump over his prone body to unlock the door to let Gon in.

He then had to promise Alluka an extra few weeks of unavoidable hugs to make up for it.

"Even in public!" she said, pointing at him.

"Yep, got it."

"Also, you have to finally call Gon your boyfriend!"

_What?!_

"Oh, no, Alluka, it's okay..." Gon said, holding up both hands as he hovered in the doorway.

"Gon," Alluka said, her voice dipping low. "You told me the other day how sad you were."

The strain in his shoulders made him realized he'd lifted them up to his ears. His throat felt full and painful, like he'd just swallowed his own tongue.

"Oh, no, I..." Gon started, and stopped. Killua looked over, and watched Gon's feet.

Gon lifted the heels of his bare feet, one at a time, leaning from one side to the other.

"Well, yeah," Killua muttered. Gon stood up straighter. Alluka hopped to his side.

"Wait, yes? You will?!"

"Well, I mean, that's what he is, right?" Killua said, to Alluka, but he looked at Gon. 

The excitement in Gon's body traveled up from the floor through the bottoms of his feet, into his legs, and up through his arms and shoulders, and widely smiling face. 

Killua had to bite his tongue, and pull in the sides of his cheeks. The delight on Gon's face electrified him and made him feel like he was floating. It was giddy, and deeply embarrassing, and he was far too cool of an older brother to let Alluka know what a big favor she'd just done for both of them. 

\----

Injustices on top of injustice. Alluka also insisted on her favorite breakfast. Scrambled eggs. Just thinking about it made Killua want to hurl. He stuck to toast, and also started the rice cooker for Gon, the weirdo who liked rice with his breakfast. 

"Alluka, let's go shopping, okay?" Killua asked.

Alluka nodded eagerly as she finished her breakfast. "Wanna come, Gon?" she asked.

"Oh, no, I have to do something today, too!"

Killua looked at him sideways. This couldn't be good.

Gon smiled at Alluka. Alluka smiled back, and stood up to get ready. Gon looked then at Killua. 

The smile shifted like a cloud passing over the sun. Darker, and more dangerous. Killua's skin tingled. Gon's eyes ignited his every nerve just like when he transformed his aura into flowing, blue electrical bolts. 

"Killua, I'll see you tonight, okay?"

Gon's smile grabbed Killua's gaze as if it had a strong grip of its own. Gon stood up to leave, and his shoulder brushed Killua's shoulder. Killua's eyes swiveled, pulled like they were on a leash, and Gon held the other end. 

A snapping reflex after movement darts through his peripheral vision, and Killua's neck twisted until his chin lined up with his shoulder.

Gon's lips were bold, and soft, and a little warm. Killua's ears flushed hot. He felt as vulnerable as that first night, as last night, as he felt when all that covered him was false moonlight. 

Gon sauntered off before either of them said another word.

"Brother! You ready?" Alluka shouted, in an excited sing-song.

Killua blinked his eyes. Guess he wasn't the only one with big plans for tonight. 

\----

Killua shoved the bag into Gon's arms. Gon stood at the door to Killua's dark bedroom.

"What's in here?" Gon asked, cheerfully. 

"If we're going to do it, we're taking precautions. Airtight, unbreakable precautions," Killua said, pointing.

Gon actually blushed. 

"Pre...cautions?"

Killua blushed, too, as he reconsidered his words. He bent, and turned on his bedside lamp.

"Just look," Killua said. Gon reached inside, and pulled out a metal box with a slot for a key, and two small memory cards. 

"Oh, this is the kind of memory card I use in my camera," Gon said. He carried the armful to the bed, and placed the objects next to each other on the bedspread. 

Killua crossed his arms. He tapped his fingers against his elbow. He didn't want to have to put the pieces together for Gon. Waiting for Gon to do it himself, though, was trying his patience in the most embarrassing way.

"Hmm, so memory cards for a camera, and a little lock box. If I took pictures, then no one could...." Gon's voice slowed to a crawl. "No one could see them, unless they had the key."

Killua whipped the key at Gon's head. Gon caught it with one hand first, his head turning second. His mouth fell open.

"Re...really?" 

Killua turned to face the bed. He looked at Gon sideways, and brought one hand across his chest to rub the side of his neck.

"Really. But you have to use those memory cards, and you can't ever, ever tell anyone, and if Alluka finds the box, or the cards," Killua said, and paused. He brought his fingers together. The spark as he transformed his aura into electricity made the hairs on his arms, neck, and eyebrows, stand on end. Gon let out an admiring, pleased hum. 

"Ooh, can you do that?"

"I mean, I've never tried, but it'd probably work. And if it doesn't, I can just crush it with my bare hands, so..."

Gon stuck his tongue out. He was only an arm's length away, so he wrapped his arms around Killua's shoulders, and pulled him into his chest.

Killua felt Gon's fingers shake, ever so slightly, as Gon kissed his temple. 

"I would guard them with my life, Killua."

Killua rolled his eyes.

"Holy shit, dude, don't do that, either. They're just pictures."

Gon's mouth opened. Killua felt the wet, warm breath. He shivered, then, as Gon's tongue followed the swirl of his ear. 

"They will be my masterpiece," Gon said quietly into Killua's ear, grinning through every syllable. 

Killua wanted to say something snippy back, but fucking Gon, the fucking cheater, knew Killua's ears might as well be his mute button. He reached around, and wrapped his arms around Gon's chest. Gon didn't pull away. Killua felt faint with gratitude for that. 

Ears were only the first front of this battle. Soon Gon's mouth had so thoroughly disoriented him, that Killua only noticed Gon had managed to pull his shirt all the way up to his shoulders when his arms were up over his head.

"Wait, Gon, Jesus, right now?" Killua asked with heavy, kiss swollen lips. 

"I agree, the lighting is terrible, but I can't wait!" Gon replied, with bursting excitement.

"Wait, the light?" Killua said, pulling his head back. The space created allowed Gon to slip the shirt up, and over Killua's head. Gon dropped the shirt. Killua looked at Gon's bent head, and curved shoulders. Gon peeked up, with one eye winking close.

"We'll just have to make do with the lamp light."

Killua's heart raced. Gon had no patience, really. He knew that. He should have expected this. He bit his bottom lip. 

"Um, Gon, uh, should I, take...?" Killua asked. His hands fluttered to the waist of his shorts. 

"Oh!" Gon exclaimed. Gon looked startled. "Uh, wow, yes, yeah." 

Killua's eyes narrowed. "Did you not..."

Gon's eyes widened exactly as much as Killua's eyes narrowed. His pink tongue peeked out. His voice flowed out like smoke, and poured on Killua's skin like molten gold.

"Oh. Please? I want to see all of Killua. Do it." 

Time creaked into some slow, drunken stupor. Killua had to force himself to move through the thick molasses of the feelings Gon's voice and eyes created in his body. He felt how hot he was, when his clothes were all off, and didn't need to look to see the proof displayed unabashedly on his body. 

Thankfully, Gon wasn't watching this part. Gon was busy fiddling with the memory card and camera. By the time Killua sat on the bed, Gon was taking a few experimental shots of the bedroom, facing away from Killua. 

"Ermm?" Killua mumbled. He held his hands together in his lap. It was an oddly proper pose considering the absurd situation that he found himself in. 

Gon let the camera fall, and hang around his neck. He looked over, and said "Oh." Long, slow, surprised, pleased, and with such blatant need that Killua felt his entire torso blush hot, and red.

Killua couldn't meet Gon's eyes. He looked at his twisting fingers. 

"What do I...?"

Gon's heavy, purposeful footfalls interrupted him. Gon's huge hands fell on his shoulders, and Killua lifted his head up. 

"You are so beautiful," Gon said. Killua felt Gon very, very gently push, but that was all it took for his back to fall to the bed. 

Killua saw the ceiling, and the fan's steady, distant blur, and heard the click, click, click. 

"You'll get to see them," Gon said. Far away. Through the fog of what he realized was arousal. Over the sound of crashing waves of heat flowing over every inch of his skin. "I won't keep any you don't like."

"Gon," Killua said. It sounded like he was throwing his voice. It sounded distant, pleasantly so. He pulled his knees up, and pushed himself fully onto the bed. As he did, Gon's feet moved, and the gentle thuds reverberated in his head. 

He knew that he should feel self-conscious. He knew he was trying to talk. He knew, he knew. He knew.

The only thing that was true, though, was how he felt. Ecstatically, painfully, vibrantly, disgustingly alive. Completely and totally seen, and without a moment's shame. 

"I don't need to see....they're for you."

Gon clucked his tongue.

"Hmmm..."

Killua's fingers flexed. His arm curled, until he touched his own belly. He felt the depth of his breathing as his stomach rose, and fell. He wanted...fuck.

"Gon, I..." 

The clicks stopped. Killua peeked over. Gon lowered his arms. He peeked over the camera. 

Killua heard Gon's deep breathing. He saw his glowing eyes. He brought his second hand to his belly. He let one hand drop towards his hips. 

"I...want...to...myself, um, ugh, that's so gross," Killua said. Gon shook his head so quickly his face blurred, but the words didn't stop. 

"I just, really want to..." Killua finished. His hands both uncurled until his fingers pointed uncomfortably straight, and stiff. 

"Not gross, Killua, but, just, if you do..." Gon said. Gon pleaded.

Something moved Killua's hands, though, something he didn't fully understand, but when he gripped himself so tightly it hurt. It fucking hurt and glowed and consumed him like nothing else. The sounds Gon made in response probably had something to do with it. 

"Killua, now I want..." 

Killua's eyes were closed. He bit his lips. His chest lifted as his spine and back curled up. He heard Gon's footfalls. He heard a sound of something being set down. He heard something rustle. He heard something pop, and a quiet hiss. He heard the gentle squeak as Gon's weight made the bed dip under his body. 

"Killua?"

Killua opened his eyes, and stopped his hands. Gon's head loomed over him. Two floating pinpricks of light, and a gaping, hungry, panting mouth. 

Suddenly, Killua felt Gon's huge, strong hand cover his own. They both gripped Killua's weeping erection. Killua lost his concentration, and pulled his hand back. His arms flipped over his head, and reached for something to grip. 

Gon's hands felt smooth and warm and silky. 

"Oh, fuck, Gon, what the fuck is that?"

"I went shopping, too," Gon replied, smoothly. His hand kept moving. His second hand cupped Killua's cheek. "I wanted to do it right, this time."

Killua lost hold of his voice, as Gon leaned down, with a smile. Gon kissed him. He reached for the back of Gon's head, and tugged on black hair until Gon purred. Gon sat back up. He reached behind, and Killua saw the bottle of lube in Gon's hands. He tried to talk, but it turned into a gargling, moaning croak. Gon laughed, low and warm, and let Killua go, for the moment. 

Gon sat back on his knees. Killua lifted both of his knees, and wrapped them quickly around Gon's waist. Gon's mouth opened in surprise, and then he smiled, just so, just so one corner pulled up towards his narrowed, glowing eyes. 

"Killua, are you trying to tell me something?" Gon teased. Killua groaned, frustrated and embarrassed. He covered his eyes with the upper arm of one hand. He nodded, without looking. 

Gon gripped the outside of Killua's thighs. He lifted them, and scooted. 

Killua lifted his arm. He watched Gon's eyes and mouth. Gon looked full to the brim with focus, and attention to his work. His nostrils flared, and his eyes darted with excitement. Killua realized, even after everything that happened the previous night, how much Gon seemed to enjoy calling the shots. 

"Fuck..." Killua crooned, from some bone deep place. He enjoyed it, too, to say the least. Gon looked up.

"Killua?"

Killua managed to smile. "The good kind of 'fuck,'" Killua explained. That actually managed to make Gon blush. 

It wouldn't be fun to just roll over, completely, in the face of Gon's power, and lust.

Fuck, actually, that would be fun, Killua realized. 

And then Killua's thoughts stopped, jammed together, and were set aside, as his mind yielded to the sensation of Gon's slippery fingers. They started by gripping and tugging on the flesh of his thighs. Gon had to squeeze, hard, to get any purchase. 

"Oh," Killua breathed out, at the dull throb of pain. 

Gon's hands slipped between Killua's spread legs. Two fingers tapped, and then dragged, down his shaft, over the sensitive skin, through and around the cleft of his ass. 

"Oooh," Killua moaned, hearing himself for the first time in a while, and feeling his excitement amplified by his own cries.

Gon used both hands to part him. One finger, and then two, quickly, moved inside. It was sharp, and fast, like a slap. 

"Ohh!" Killua gasped, and curled up. He met Gon's eyes, and a shadow of worry colored Gon's eyes, until he saw the open mouthed, wide eyed plea for _More._

Gon's fingers slid out, and Killua felt something cold drip down between his legs. Two huge, warm hands rubbed it up and against Killua's shaft, and down, lower. He felt primed, eager, and ready for anything. 

"It's okay."

Gon licked his lips. "You sure?"

"It's okay," Killua could only repeat. He leaned up, and grabbed Gon's shoulders. Gon bent over, and pressed his lips against the bobbing curve of Killua's neck. Gon shoved himself inside of Killua with slow, unsteady strokes. 

Lubricated, in every sense, their movements together felt easier, hotter, better, so much better, than last night. Intensity faded to make way for Gon's smile when Killua gasped, or Gon's fluttering eyelashes as Killua stroked a cheek. Neither was in any hurry, tonight. 

"We should have..." Gon said, as he leaned down, and started finally to move harder, a destination firmly in mind, now. Killua lifted his hips with one foot, and hooked his other around Gon's pumping hips. "...done this a long time ago..." 

Killua laughed, right in Gon's ears. He followed that with a sharp nip, causing Gon to yelp, and buck into him harder.

"No fucking kidding," Killua agreed, with a choppy voice. 

Gon laughed, and Killua would learn that Gon's magnificent, youthful, musical laugh would turn out to be a signal that he was close. Gon's laugh stirred up pleasure in Killua deeper than anything else could.

"Are you...are you gonna...?" Gon asked, eagerly. Killua bit his lip, and paused, before nodding. 

"But you..." Gon asked, with a shimmery, teasing quality. "...need my help...?" 

Gon reached between their bodies. The touch of Gon's hands started the chain reaction. Killua's fingernails curled deeply into the muscle of Gon's back. He pulled himself up, until he curved off of the bed. Gon wrapped his arm around Killua's back, supporting him, as he continued to move his hips and hands. 

As soon as Killua started to come, Gon covered his mouth, and nipped at his lips, and extended everything for so, so long that tears came to Killua's eyes. 

Gon finally released Killua. He moved back, towering like a bronze statue over Killua's limp frame. As soon as his chest and back straightened, Gon's hands grabbed Killua's hips. They squeezed as Gon's eyes closed, and mouth opened, unleashing a sighing, moaning, surprised sound. Killua lifted Gon's fingers, and weaved them together with his. He felt the prick of his tears. Gon collapsed against Killua with a large, contented huff, and now it was Killua's turn to laugh. 

Killua gently pushed Gon off of him, and rolled the lump of melted candlewax flesh over onto the sheets. He stood up. Gon blinked his eyes open.

"Killua?"

The lights were still one, so Killua saw the camera, and the other memory card on the table. He grabbed both, and turned the device over. He found the opening for the memory card, and pressed his thumbnail down, opening it.

"Killuuuua?" Gon slurred, rolling over to his side. "Whatcha doing, Killua?"

"My turn." 

Killua carefully slipped out the memory card. He saw the key he'd tossed Gon earlier on the table. He put the new memory card in the camera, and set it carefully down. He took the memory card he'd just removed, and grabbed the lock box, which had ended up on the floor. He opened it, and slid the card inside. He snapped it shut, grabbed the key, and locked the box. He set it down carefully, and picked up the camera again.

"Your turn?" Gon asked. His voice was lazy, and low, and a bit sleepy.

"Don't tell me you're going to fall asleep after one round, Gon, you wimp," Killua teased. His voice shook, though. Just like Gon's fingers had, earlier. 

"I'm not gonna fall asleep," Gon replied, low, and definitely sleepy. "What're you doing, though?"

"These are for me," Killua said. He slipped the strap of the camera over his neck. He climbed on the bed, and crawled next to Gon.

"For you?" Gon said, realization dawning on him. 

Killua pulled the camera up against his face. The view finder made Gon look farther away than the reality of this hot press of skin against his knee. 

The camera clicked, and clicked, and clicked, as Killua pressed down the button.

"Oooh, so that's how it works," Killua said. Gon let out a little mewl of surprise.

"Wait, Killua, what are you doing?"

"Taking pictures."

Gon shivered, and Killua pulled the camera down.

"Why?" Gon asked. Excited. A touch nervous.

Killua smirked.

"They're for me," Killua explained. "Pictures of you, for me. Only fair, right?"

\----

Gon and Killua and Alluka had another two months together. Once Alluka finally overcame her shyness, she became Gon's muse. He took thousands of pictures of her, and she loved every second. 

"Never in a million years would I have pictured Gon as a fashion photographer," Killua teased, during one of their last nights together. He looked at Gon, diligently editing photos.

"Alluka is such a good model. A million times better than her brother," Gon said, looking over. "Her brother always bites his lip, and wriggles, and tells the photographer to get over here, and kiss him before..." Gon drawled, until he was interrupted by the fluffy sound of a pillow smacking him the face. 

"Fuck you," Killua said, before turning to his cell phone. The notification button was blinking at 3 in the morning, which couldn't possibly be a good sign.

"Hmmm?" Gon hummed, after a few minutes of Killua's sudden, distracted silence. 

Killua's mouth dried up. He clicked, and clicked on his phone. The message was long, and it was so late, so he had to reread it a few times.

"We need to...Alluka and I need to move. Soon. Like, by the end of the week, soon."

Killua heard Gon close the laptop. Gon set it on the floor, and made the mattress creak as he leaned back over. He wrapped Killua in a bear hug. Killua lay there, without moving, until he felt the sting in his eyes. He dropped his phone into his lap, and covered his eyes with his hands. Gon face carefully fit into the curve of his neck.

"You and Alluka?"

Killua scrunched his eyes tightly closed. He jammed his face further into his hands.

"I need to get back to..."

They both knew the answer. They hadn't discussed it, but they both knew. They'd danced around it, with their careful, stubbornly evasive words. Practiced liars by omission, both of them. 

Gon kissed Killua's neck, in exactly that right spot, but Killua felt the lips quiver. 

Killua tossed off his hands. He rolled over, until he covered Gon's chest and legs with his own.

"Shhhh..." Killua said, his voice gravel. He covered Gon's mouth with his own. Gon clung to him, and Killua kissed Gon's silent, stubborn tears. 

\----

Alluka couldn't stop crying, and they nearly missed their train. She clung to Gon's arm, and gave him a million kisses on both cheeks. Killua finally had to grab her by the shoulder, and coax her over towards his side. He kissed the top of his sweet sister's head.

"We'll call when we get to our next city," Killua promised. He put on his best big brother voice - serious, in control, gentle, playful, easy. Gon nodded, and bent down one more time.

"Send me pictures of any new outfits, Alluka, okay? I will plan something amazing for our next photo shoot," he said. He kissed her forehead. Alluka just nodded, as her face and nose dripped. 

Gon stood up. He smiled. Patented, and sunny. All of his straight teeth in a row like dutiful soldiers. 

"You don't want to be late, Killua." 

Killua bit his lip, bent his head, and released his lip in one fluid movement. He nodded. 

"No, we gotta go."

"Killua..." Gon started. Killua wrapped his arms around Gon's neck.

"See you later."

Gon nodded into his shoulder. The departing train whistled, and Alluka grabbed Killua's hand. She tugged, gently.

"Let's go, brother."

Killua stood up, too stiffly and too quickly. He turned away. Gon's voice followed them.

"Have a safe trip! I love you two!"

Killua couldn't look back. Alluka pulled him through the door, and found their seats. 

Alluka's tears stopped after a few minutes of the train's gentle chugging. Killua didn't look out the window. He crossed one foot over his other knee, and leaned on one fist. He very carefully stayed very still. 

"Brother?"

After some unknown amount of time passed, Alluka finally broke into his reverie. 

"I was supposed to wait until we got there to give you this, but, here."

Alluka reached inside her flowing sleeve, and pulled out a small package. It was wrapped up with the colorful newspapers of their home city for these last months, and tied with a thin, blue ribbon. 

Killua didn't take it, at first. He just looked at it, like it was going to bite. Alluka just smiled, and set it down, before pulling out her phone. Killua picked it up when her focus was finally settled elsewhere.

He tugged on the ribbon, and unwrapped the package. 

The newspaper unfolded without much coaxing. A framed picture, and a small envelope sat inside. Killua pulled out the frame. 

It was a picture of their small apartment's kitchen. Killua was looking over his shoulder, as Alluka and Gon took one of their million selfies together. They all looked warm, and happy. Alluka's pretty eyes sparkled, and Gon's goofy, contagious grin was wide. Killua's face was almost unrecognizable. 

He looked at those two like the adoring, dopey, head-over-heels dipshit he was. 

He set the frame down, and picked up the envelope.

Inside was a single printed photo. He couldn't discern what it was, immediately. 

Smears of blue and white and purple swirled in the frame. It was on the tip of his brain. He flipped it upside down, and then right side up. He covered his mouth with his hands as it hit him.

It was Killua, sound asleep. Mouth relaxed, eyes closed, face smooth like a statue. 

It felt like Gon had grabbed his heart, and squeezed. It was so personal, and weird, and invasive, and vulnerable, to see himself as Gon did, every night. He gulped, and flipped the photo over, to set it down.

He saw the clear, chunky, and familiar hand writing. 

Alluka gave a small yelp as Killua started crying. Loud, hiccuping sobs.

"Brother!" she said, and sat up. She reached over, and pulled the photo away from Killua's flimsy grip, as tears fell over it. 

"Oh, jeesh, brother," she said, a touch annoyed that this was the first she'd seen him cry since Gon had visited, but her heart moved by the sight, all the same. She flipped the photo over, to wipe off both sides with her sleeve. Her own heart jumped, too, as she read Gon's note.

_"My treasure."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PHEW! That sure got sappy. But, I think those two deserve it, personally. 
> 
> If you have any feedback, good or bad, I would love to read your comments. <3
> 
> If you would like, too, I am on tumblr! murderxbaby.tumblr.com. I would love to chat with you there, too!


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